Normally I schedule my blog post topics a few weeks out, and even write them as far in advance as I can... but that didn't work out recently. My mental health issues - which I have written about before - are giving me quite the pummeling recently, and my ability to be focused and remotely organized is suffering. Here are some current random thoughts.
- I'm watching baseball tonight. My favorite baseball team is in the National League Championship Series for the first time in a long time. The last time they actually won a World Series was my senior year of high school. Yes, I'm that old. The responsibility for my love of just about every single possible sport belongs squarely to my late father, though, with the exception of Ohio State, I was never a fan of his favorite teams. (This is a good thing, because he was a lifelong Browns fan, and that's a thing that brought him no small amount of anguish over the years.) Baseball has a special place in my heart, and is my favorite sport to watch in person.\
- Not sleeping well is causing me to be in a near-constant state of exhaustion, which is surely leading me to an early death. Last night, I turned in at a very reasonable hour, and actually fell asleep... only to wake up after a couple of hours. By the time I managed to look at the clock, it was around 1:40, but my wife says she noticed me being awake and disturbed around 12:30. I was awake most of the rest of the night, which was no good, because I had a morning online training session for my corporate job (indie rock does not pay the bills), and I kind of needed to be able to think clearly and focus for that. No bueno. If there is any bright side here, I managed to write a song between the hours of 3 and 4 in the morning, and I don't hate it yet.
- I might write a series of musings on love at some point, much like I did this year with a series on dreams. I tend to develop a certain amount of affection for anyone with whom I have ever had a particularly meaning conversation, and for the people I have known the longest, that tends to run deeper. Of course, there are people who one loves because one decides to, and people who one no longer loves because one decides not to, but for me, most of all that isn't very voluntary. I've been thinking about this more recently because some of my classmates from way way back in my youth have been dealing with assorted types of life adversity, and one of the decent things about social media is the ability for us to know some of these things. I've recently been feeling a mix of being heartbroken for them while also in awe of their resilient spirit and perseverance.